They tell you last-minute about a program for the kids so that you may not be able to make it. Or they change the plan so that it’s no longer convenient or fun. They show up late or they call last minute and cancel due to something that just popped up. And they ‘re great with reasons: ”Oh, I thought your son told you about the kids,” or “I didn’t see our lunch date on my calendar.”īesides being forgetful, they are also great saboteurs. Brann suggest that passive-aggressive behavior manifests in a few obvious patterns: Passive-aggressive people tend to “forget” things-like the plans they agreed to with you, like thanking you for the nice birthday gift, like telling you about the grandkids’ latest achievement. You can see patterns emerge that always happen.ĭr. And you should also know-even if she doesn’t– that if you put your son in the middle, the chances are he’ll defend his wife and kids. But you, as the more mature one, know that she holds the keys to the kingdom-your son and grandkids. Ironically, in this little power struggle, she sees you as the Queen Bee. Her perception of your power is flawed.Still, that doesn’t make this personal-it’s simply a go-to way of coping. But, in her mind, who is more powerful that the mother of the man she married? That would be you. Chances are she behaves this way with your son, her kids, her friends-in any situation where she feels powerless. You are NOT the only target of her behavior-though it may certainly feel that way.Brann explains the following to give insight: Before you can deal with her, you need to understand her.ĭr.
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